Wednesday, 14 July 2010

Heading towards a New Chapter =)

When I was a child I always wanted to be a wife and a mother. I don't know why, I always thought of marriage as something pure and beautiful; and I wanted to love a man who loves me back. At that point of my life, I don't care whoever it is, I just want to fall head over heels with prince charming with hopes of becoming his wife and also the mother of his children. It's almost as if my whole life's purpose was to get married and have a family of my own... Naive, aren't I? =D

But after many years since puberty and loads of heartbreaks throughout my love life (up until now, of course) plus advices I got from me mum, I learned that marriage is not as easy as ordering pizza on the phone. It can't be delivered on your doorstep while you're busy playing Cafeworld in Facebook. It needs tremendous effort and sacrifice of your time and money. Also, there are tons of things that need to be carefully thought of.

Firstly, you need to think about the best approach towards your parents to let them know that you want to get married, so that they don't get completely shocked about it... (when I say 'shocked' - that is... in a bad, bad way, of course)
One Saturday morning, Razi told me to ask my parents whether they're free on that day because he wants to meet both of them. He said, "trust me", and I did. So that afternoon, he managed to talk through our wedding plan with them. Thankfully, my parents were expecting this and they agreed to meet his parents the following weekend, which will be this coming one. (Note: I am so excited that I'm going to meet his parents the first time, but DEAD NERVOUS at the same time.) Its kind of like Merisik, if you ask me, but well... It'll just involve me and my parents, my uncle & his wife, his parents and his uncle. Wish me luck, please... ~

Besides that, you also need to think about how your wedding is going to be - simple/moderate/extravagant. For me and Razi we were hoping that we could have a simple and cost effective wedding, yet memorable and to our taste, and most importantly, to have it as early as possible! *wink wink* You know, our aim was to have it in December, GILA TAK? =p
But well, it's easier said than done, plus we only thought about ourselves, disregarding both of our families. So... Long story -> SHORT:
  • Initial choice made: Nikah ONLY
    At first we wanted a truly simple wedding, like those without Tunang and Walimah (reception), we would love to only have the Nikah ceremony done.
  • 2nd choice made: Nikah and Joint Walimah
    But after considering how our friends and relatives would feel if we didn't invite them to our wedding (simply because Nikah has always been done within a small crowd), we decided to have a joint Walimah. That means, guests from BOTH sides are invited to one wedding reception.
  • 3rd choice made: Nikah and Separate Walimahs (Sanding & Tandang)
    Well, after telling my parents about our idea, they disagreed and decided to have a separate Walimah for guests from our side. Their reason: "Jemputan dari Mak & Ayah je dah 1000 orang" Waaaa... Nasib baik laaa kenduri Mak Ayah yang sponsor! ;p
  • FINAL CHOICE: Tunang, Nikah and Seperate Walimahs (Sanding & Tandang)
    Tunang? My parents' wishes, yet again... 'Nuff said.

But WAITT! I haven't finished yet...
So, since we have four seperate ceremonies, there's obviously more stuff to think about and things to be done! Hantaran, duit hantaran, henna, baju tunang, baju nikah, baju sanding, baju bertandang, theme color for each ceremony = theme color X 4, photographer X 4, videography (maybe? so, X 4?), guests, door gifts X 4, venue X 4, and the list keeps going on and on and on and on........... *sigh sigh SIGH*
And since we have to be engaged first, our tying-the-knot too have to be delayed. =( Hmmm...

LESSON LEARNED: Marriage doesn't just involve the union of two lovebirds, but it is the union of two families. (Ayat jahat = Bila kau nak kahwin, sebenarnya kan... Macam parents kau yang kahwin. Hahaha. Mana taknyeee... Semua benda diorang nak decide.)
Therefore, future-brides-and-grooms-to-be, do not - I repeat - DO NOT make wedding decisions on your own! You'll just get disappointed... like I did. *sigh*

But I believe everything happens for a reason. Both me and my dearest Razi are trying our best to be optimistic and just go with the flow. We just hope for the best, that everybody would be happy... Because we believe in tolerance and respect, don't we, Razi? =)

And last but not least (actually there are only 3 ideas that I could come up with at this moment =p)... You have to think about after the wedding. After spending tons of MONEY on your wedding, can you survive with the amount of $$$ you have left?

Well, Razi and I still have a long way to go after we told the good news (pasal marriage-laaa) to both of our parents. We just graduated but have long decided to get married, even at the earliest stage of our relationship. Because the feeling of knowing that you've FINALLY MET YOUR SOULMATE is like nothing that we have ever felt or even KNOWN before. It's undeniably and completely indescribable... *ANGAU*

. . .

Well, back to the point where I left off - we have long decided to get married, but the need got stronger after both of us went to Pameran Pengantin at Midvalley Exhibition Centre last 4th of July. Razi became really enthusiastic about this and thought out our wedding plan. We started surveying wedding outfits, halls and even makeup artists. (Ngeee.. Ta sabar! =D ) I myself have started making budgets for our wedding ever since. So far, the experience of planning our own wedding is REALLY exciting! OUR OWN WEDDING... Geee... I'm finally old enough to get married. Yay for me!

If we want to make this plan work, we need to stop shopping for clothes (fyi, we can go nuts, you know, just by browsing around shopping malls) and start saving some cash! Thank God Razi dah keje!

But, eh... first, I need to get a JOB, like.. NOW! Chop chop CHOP~

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