Friday 30 July 2010

Welcoming Note; or Portrait of A Young Man as A Wedding Enthusiast

“Youuuu.. Jgn buat lawak boleh tak? Kitorang tuang air ni kt muka you karang!!!”. That’s the spontaneous reaction I got from my closest girlfriends once I told them that I actually chose HER out ouf everyone else. Miss Ayam, Miss Panda and Miss Chia (don't ask me why), or collectively known (somehow) as MEW --- they have been trying for hours to guess which girl is the girl of my choice. I've given them 5 options, then another 5, then another.. till they all but have exhausted themselves. None of the girls (or women) they mentioned was right. Somehow it never occured to them that I would ever take the hand of this special girl. She was deemed "not my taste" by them, I guess. So they don't even once consider her (only a by-line mention by Miss Panda). But that's pretty fair considering how much I've spent time telling them my life story (all of them are younger than me, hence the name 'Kakak Sulong").[on second thought, maybe I did not spend enough time with them hahaha].I guess I was tired with the same kind of "type" they have been guessing me with. I guess I was acting out of the norm. I break my own habit and I think I took the road less taken because I can sense that there's more to this girl than meets the eye. So I chose Sue.

[i]

Ingat lagi masa first time jumpa dia <-- chop chop chop! This is too cliche. Biasa sangat starting new story or paragraph macam ni. Poyo sial

[Disclaimer: Tolong la jangan percaya sangat. Our so called 'memory' sometimes tends to deceive us. We unconciously select and deletes part of our life story.. leaving the rest intact. That's why it's called Selective Memory]

Well, okla. To tell you, dear audience, the truth, I never once believed in the concept of love at first sight. I guess it's for those who are shallow and/or too naive to know that it takes more than just good looks to be a good partner. But I don't deny the power of first impression. And I guess for simplicity's sake, and time (or the lack of it) it would be easier to judge a book by it's cover. It's considered.. natural. That's why it took some considerable patience and exercise to actually restrain yourself from doing so and give people the benefit of the doubt. And that's exactly what I did. I gave HER the benefit of the doubt. I can't remember what she wears exactly or how did she enter the class that very first day of our meeting (Sorry sayang! :P) But I remember that she instantly became the talk of the class (and the fact that she came in late. a l l t h e t i m e). Us seniors - guys I mean - we're making jokes like "eh, tu aku punya" and so on and so forth. I took a view, recognized her appearance, in the nod with the rest of the guys and acknowledged her beauty and that's that. I moved on. I let the other guys continue their drool (and they did! For the whole semester) "Baik sangat untuk aku". I admit that she triggered my hunting mode but I suppress that impulse quickly (Maybe because I thought I'll never even win her, haha!)

Time passes by. Till one very fine day, she brought with her some chocolates and decided to share it with a few people sitting close to her (FYI, if I remember correctly, she always brought something to class [oh, rupanya usha la selama ni kalo tak macamana leh tau!]) And that very day, I was one of the lucky few to actually get to share the chocolate. We get to tell jokes and share a few anecdotes over it.

(please note that the following conversation is not the first contact I had with her. There were a few before that but they are not oh-so-memorable compared to this one)

Razi: bla bla bla
Sue: blu blu blu <-- eh eh ada karer la. mcm karaoke!
[.....]

*rising anticipation. interest are high*

Razi: um, u suka chocolate la?
Sue: a'ah. u?
Razi: i pun suka gak. i suka dark chocolate <-- ni bukan ayat manis eh, gua mmg suka cokelat
Sue: eh, i pun! sama la <-- dan dan! tapi hati aku da melompat2(tapi btol la dia suka coklat)
Razi: well u know what they say about people who loves dark chocolate right?
Sue: ape?
Razi: bla bla bla
Sue(muka terkejut): ha? takmola sama dengan u camtu.

And all hope was lost :(

[ii]

"Jadi yang empunya badan setuju lah ye?", asked my dad. Sue is Sue; being the tough girl and in the comfort of her own home, surrounded with people who loves her, solemnly and confidently replied, "Setuju" (that's my girl! :D ). And it's done.

Yeap, you guessed it right. That was the day my parents and I went to her house to meet her parents. Previous week was the time that I went out of my way and personally ask for Sue's hand in marriage from her parents[Phew, thank God that went well -- Kindly refer to previous post]. I can still remember the scene: me sitting in the middle, this end of the table with her facing directly in front of me, albeit at the other end. And our parents are on the side of the table; there we sit, all 6 of us and it was magical! It's like a glimpse of the future that we will have. I'm already halfway through heaven =)

***********************************

Those are some episodes worth mentioning; retrospective testimonials that enrich my life story. It became our life story now, as our destiny are now intertwined with each other. And it will become more and more intricate that the density will be too much to handle - eventually, the demarcation line is no more and our life will be in a state of union: one.

*suara makmum lepas dgr suara as-Sudais: aaaamiinnnnnnn*

To those who stumbled upon this blog hoping that we will blog about wedding preparation and stuffs, you've come to the right place [Soundtrack queue: All ABOARD!!!]. But it will not be limited to that. It is also the documentation of the state of our mind, as a lovely young cant-wait-to-wed couple [MEW cheers Hooray!]

It have come to my attention that bridegroom-to-be don't really blog about their wedding. It was perpetrated as if Marriage and Weddings are of the female domain and has been their preoccupation since they were little girls (FYI, that was this blog's initial name). I don't know and could not care less whether my attempt here at blogging this is somewhat groundbreaking or not. But I have to admit that marriage intrigues me so much, it's just a pity that I'm no son of some rich b*s*t*rd ... (ok ok I've promised her not to swear. sorry hunny!) or else I'll be rocking this Wedding till the roof goes off! (Or I'd made a fortune being a Wedding Planner - i'm telling ya, it's lucrative business!)

That's it for now peeps. An introductory note from your friendly-neighbourhood Male Wedding Enthusiast (erk, that doesn't sound quite right). Will be updating with tons of wedding infos, points and head ups, as well as some sneak peek to our own wedding preparation and eventually, our own perfectly executed, cost-effective, eco-friendly, syariah-compliant wedding (and hence, our life)


Wednesday 14 July 2010

Heading towards a New Chapter =)

When I was a child I always wanted to be a wife and a mother. I don't know why, I always thought of marriage as something pure and beautiful; and I wanted to love a man who loves me back. At that point of my life, I don't care whoever it is, I just want to fall head over heels with prince charming with hopes of becoming his wife and also the mother of his children. It's almost as if my whole life's purpose was to get married and have a family of my own... Naive, aren't I? =D

But after many years since puberty and loads of heartbreaks throughout my love life (up until now, of course) plus advices I got from me mum, I learned that marriage is not as easy as ordering pizza on the phone. It can't be delivered on your doorstep while you're busy playing Cafeworld in Facebook. It needs tremendous effort and sacrifice of your time and money. Also, there are tons of things that need to be carefully thought of.

Firstly, you need to think about the best approach towards your parents to let them know that you want to get married, so that they don't get completely shocked about it... (when I say 'shocked' - that is... in a bad, bad way, of course)
One Saturday morning, Razi told me to ask my parents whether they're free on that day because he wants to meet both of them. He said, "trust me", and I did. So that afternoon, he managed to talk through our wedding plan with them. Thankfully, my parents were expecting this and they agreed to meet his parents the following weekend, which will be this coming one. (Note: I am so excited that I'm going to meet his parents the first time, but DEAD NERVOUS at the same time.) Its kind of like Merisik, if you ask me, but well... It'll just involve me and my parents, my uncle & his wife, his parents and his uncle. Wish me luck, please... ~

Besides that, you also need to think about how your wedding is going to be - simple/moderate/extravagant. For me and Razi we were hoping that we could have a simple and cost effective wedding, yet memorable and to our taste, and most importantly, to have it as early as possible! *wink wink* You know, our aim was to have it in December, GILA TAK? =p
But well, it's easier said than done, plus we only thought about ourselves, disregarding both of our families. So... Long story -> SHORT:
  • Initial choice made: Nikah ONLY
    At first we wanted a truly simple wedding, like those without Tunang and Walimah (reception), we would love to only have the Nikah ceremony done.
  • 2nd choice made: Nikah and Joint Walimah
    But after considering how our friends and relatives would feel if we didn't invite them to our wedding (simply because Nikah has always been done within a small crowd), we decided to have a joint Walimah. That means, guests from BOTH sides are invited to one wedding reception.
  • 3rd choice made: Nikah and Separate Walimahs (Sanding & Tandang)
    Well, after telling my parents about our idea, they disagreed and decided to have a separate Walimah for guests from our side. Their reason: "Jemputan dari Mak & Ayah je dah 1000 orang" Waaaa... Nasib baik laaa kenduri Mak Ayah yang sponsor! ;p
  • FINAL CHOICE: Tunang, Nikah and Seperate Walimahs (Sanding & Tandang)
    Tunang? My parents' wishes, yet again... 'Nuff said.

But WAITT! I haven't finished yet...
So, since we have four seperate ceremonies, there's obviously more stuff to think about and things to be done! Hantaran, duit hantaran, henna, baju tunang, baju nikah, baju sanding, baju bertandang, theme color for each ceremony = theme color X 4, photographer X 4, videography (maybe? so, X 4?), guests, door gifts X 4, venue X 4, and the list keeps going on and on and on and on........... *sigh sigh SIGH*
And since we have to be engaged first, our tying-the-knot too have to be delayed. =( Hmmm...

LESSON LEARNED: Marriage doesn't just involve the union of two lovebirds, but it is the union of two families. (Ayat jahat = Bila kau nak kahwin, sebenarnya kan... Macam parents kau yang kahwin. Hahaha. Mana taknyeee... Semua benda diorang nak decide.)
Therefore, future-brides-and-grooms-to-be, do not - I repeat - DO NOT make wedding decisions on your own! You'll just get disappointed... like I did. *sigh*

But I believe everything happens for a reason. Both me and my dearest Razi are trying our best to be optimistic and just go with the flow. We just hope for the best, that everybody would be happy... Because we believe in tolerance and respect, don't we, Razi? =)

And last but not least (actually there are only 3 ideas that I could come up with at this moment =p)... You have to think about after the wedding. After spending tons of MONEY on your wedding, can you survive with the amount of $$$ you have left?

Well, Razi and I still have a long way to go after we told the good news (pasal marriage-laaa) to both of our parents. We just graduated but have long decided to get married, even at the earliest stage of our relationship. Because the feeling of knowing that you've FINALLY MET YOUR SOULMATE is like nothing that we have ever felt or even KNOWN before. It's undeniably and completely indescribable... *ANGAU*

. . .

Well, back to the point where I left off - we have long decided to get married, but the need got stronger after both of us went to Pameran Pengantin at Midvalley Exhibition Centre last 4th of July. Razi became really enthusiastic about this and thought out our wedding plan. We started surveying wedding outfits, halls and even makeup artists. (Ngeee.. Ta sabar! =D ) I myself have started making budgets for our wedding ever since. So far, the experience of planning our own wedding is REALLY exciting! OUR OWN WEDDING... Geee... I'm finally old enough to get married. Yay for me!

If we want to make this plan work, we need to stop shopping for clothes (fyi, we can go nuts, you know, just by browsing around shopping malls) and start saving some cash! Thank God Razi dah keje!

But, eh... first, I need to get a JOB, like.. NOW! Chop chop CHOP~